Review: Punctuation Humor

Announcements: October 7th, 2016

Punctuation Humor
Source: MentalFloss

Famous Last Words: Failure

This week has been a great lesson that, even when life doesn't work out exactly like you want it to, it's still going pretty well. After pouring countless hours and significant effort into my application for the Ewing Fellowship, I got an e-mail yesterday that I was not selected for the award. I wasn't particularly happy; months of hard work appeared to be for not. However, as I talked to some other people, I realized that this award might have been out of my reach to begin with. This year, every recipient of the Fellowship was a Junior. In fact, I believe that I may have been the only sophomore even interviewed. I firmly believe that if you aren't attempting to do things that are slightly outside of your grasp, you aren't pushing yourself. Maybe this rejection was just what I needed to become re-energized as we approach scholarship/award season here at OU. Luckily, I don't think that the Ewing was my only chance to go to DC this summer... the LGBTQ Alum Club offers a scholarship to fund an internship relating to queer issues, and the DC Alum Club for OU offers a scholarship for internships in DC. There are clearly still options for me, and even if I don't end up working for the Human Rights Campaign this summer, I might study abroad or do something similar. I need to figure out when I'm going abroad, actually... I have to do it for my major, and I still haven't found the time to do so. Oh well. For now, I'm just focused on having a super relaxing weekend, doing some work, getting ahead on some things, and just spending time with friends. As we are half-way through Day 1, I have to say that it is a success.

Pun on a Post-It
Source: Flickr

Learning Challenge: Attention and Being Calm

Imaged created by https://memegenerator.net/MemeGenerator

Growth Mindset: Space for Failure

Image created by MemeGenerator

Tech Tip: Quotemakers (Force of Nature)

Image created with BeHappy.me
Quote from Grey's Anatomy

Story: Battle of the Brothers

Battle of the Brothers

Scene: Arjuna and Karna meet in the middle of a clearing. All fighting between their respective armies has ceased.

ARJUNA- Karna, this fighting is senseless. Let us settle this battle ourselves; there is no need to endanger the lives of others in order for us to solve our own issues with each other.

KARNA- It shall be so.

The skilled warriors consulted with brahmins and other holy men on how they should proceed, and the following rules were established:

1.     Celestial weapons and other boons of the gods would not be allowed.

2.     Each participant would only be allowed a single weapon of their own choosing.

3.     Each participant would be outfitted with the same basic armor.

4.     The duel would be over when one participant either conceded or died. There would be no other way for the duel to conclude.

5.     Victory in this skirmish would mean victory in the war.

6.     By the powers of the gods, the terrain would change at different intervals in order to ensure that neither participant was given an advantage.

7.     Violation of these guidelines in any way would anger the gods to such an extent that the individual would be condemned to never ascend to the heavens.

With the rules in place, each of the warriors drew their weapon. Arjuna, to the surprise of no man, drew his bow to do battle with his brother. Karna drew his sword. Everyone else drew a deep breath, silently praying to anyone that would listen.

A brahmin drew a circle around Arjuna and Karna, and with the clap of Krishna’s hands, the circle became a jungle.

The warriors began.

Arjuna quickly scaled a tree, firing volley after volley. Karna, moving with an almost inhuman speed, easily avoided the deadly darts and bided his time in the brush.

The circle became a desert.

Unhindered by trees and plants, Karna came charging at Arjuna with his full force, while Arjuna fired a single, solitary arrow into Karna’s shoulder. Karna felt a searing pain, but was otherwise unperturbed. When he finally reached Arjuna, he swung desperately and was able to slice off Arjuna's legs.

The circle became an ocean.

Bleeding out from his midsection, Arjuna used his arms to recover some seaweed that he proceeded to wrap around his wound in order to stem the flow of the bleeding. As he did this, he observed that Karna was drowning. Arjuna fired more arrows, albeit imprecisely due to his precarious position, and was able to hit both of Karna’s hands.

The circle became a field.

Karna, now unable to wield his sword, ran straight at Arjuna with murderous intent. Before he was able to reach him, however, Arjuna fired a few more arrows into Karna that prevented Karna from using his arms at all (Arjuna was a master of pressure points). Karna ultimately fell at Arjuna’s side, but not before kicking his arms so hard that they broke. Fully incapacitated and close to totally decapitated, both participants merely lay there until their wounds bled out and they moved on to the next life. The war was over. No one had won, but it was over. There was no celebrating, no singing; both sides had lost a valued and strong leader. The armies solemnly took the bodies and burned them with the dignity due to a ruler. There was much to do in the coming weeks, but this, this was a time for mourning.

Arjuna and Karna Battle
Source: Flickr

Author’s Note- After reading the 67th section of the PDE version of the story (the section involving the showdown between Karna and Arjuna), I was struck with the thought that, if it was all going to come down to these two, why would we need to have the rest of the war? Couldn’t these two just battle it out themselves? I was already frustrated when I learned about the wars that have been fought in history over a spat between two rulers or people, so this story is also me being a somewhat angsty human being who doesn't understand why people force other people to fight for them. It is in that spirit that I wrote the above story. I chose the picture above because it represents a point in the battle where either could've won... with both aiming at the other, the story is still largely unwritten (until now). I included the song that I did below both because the video is heavily influenced by Indian culture and because its melancholy melody seems to be a great "post-fight" song. The "Dog Days" of the war really are over. In the original source, Arjuna is able to slay Karna in a minute of weakness, but I love writing/reading stories where the "good guy" doesn't win in the end just because they hold the title. If art imitates life, then we should be telling stories where the person with the moral high-ground only wins some of the time.

Reading Notes: PDE Mahabharata, Part D

Bibliography: PDE Mahabharata

Bhishma Falls

Story telling- Bhishma couldn’t kill anyone born a man

Drona in Command

Story telling- Drona trades his life for Bhishma

Abhimanyu and Jayadratha

How weak is Krishna that he can’t just obliterate these mortals

Ghatotkacha

Story telling- Abhimanyu and Ghatotkacha were actually lovers, a fact which is only revealed after their deaths

Death of Drona

Why isn’t everyone filled with that same “courage and hope”?

Bhima and Duhshasana

Story telling- everyone forgives the debts of the other and goes him

Arjuna and Karna

Why didn’t these two people just fight in the beginning? Might have saved everyone a lot of bloodshed instead of requiring that everyone fight a battle for their lord.

Story telling- the gods intervened to stop Karna’s cheating

Duryodhana in the Lake

Story telling- Duryodhana just stays in the lake forever and builds a kingdom under the sea

The Raid

Ashwatthaman's Jewel

Story telling- The jewel is actually a mind-control device

Mourning

Story telling- Dhritarashtra stopped the battle before it started because he’s the father of basically everyone and patriarchy seems to be pretty important

The Pandavas and Bhishma

Wait he was never guilty of a sin? Ever?

King Yudhishthira's Horse

Story telling- Krishna has to be careful of what he says because everything that he says becomes fact/reality

Parikshit

Horse Sacrifice

Story telling- no horse comes forward to be sacrificed

The Mongoose

Wait huh

The Forest and its Ghosts

Story telling- the women don’t die for their husbands

Death of Krishna

That was quick.

The Pandavas Depart

Wow, these gods are not messing around. Those are such minor sins.

The Afterlife

#TheCakeIsALie

Yudhishthira and the Dog
Source: Wikipedia

Reading Notes: PDE Mahabharata, Part C

Bibliography: PDE Mahabharata

Life in the Forest

So did the copper pot contain just SOME food? What kind of boon is that?

Story telling- the copper pot was a portkey

Krishna's Visit

Story teling- Draupadi doesn’t act entitled to anything because of her gender

Arjuna and Shiva

And again, the hero gets the weapons he needs to win.

Arjuna and Indra

Story telling- the apsaras stage a coup

The Himalayas

Time passes so quickly in this universe

Who is this Markandeya?

Bhima and Hanuman

Story telling- Hanuman tells Rama’s story as a means of sustenance. He goes insane because he must continue to tell it.

Duryodhana and the Gandharvas

Karna and Indra

Story telling- Arjuna and Karna reject the “natural order”

Jayadratha and Draupadi

Well that was quick

Riddles at the Lake

Where do all of these Brahmin come from?

Are there more than three worlds?

The Court of King Virata

There’s a whole goddess for giving boons? All anyone seems to do is give boons.

Bhima and Kichaka

Story telling- Kichaka is punished by the gods for being a rapist

The Cattle Raid

Preparations for War

Krishna loves himself some drama. Also, someone needs to make a family tree

Krishna and His Army

Story telling- Krishna rejects Arjuna

Krishna's Mission to the Kauravas

Story telling- Krishna accidentally kills everyone

Krishna and Karna

The Armies at Kurukshetra

Seriously, where is the family tree? This is going to make the annual reunion really awko tacos.

Bhagavad-Gita

I’d love to read that in the original Hindi (if I was able to speak Hindi of course)

Statue of Ghatotkacha in Bali
Source: INK361